Epstein autopsy now official at "assisted suicide"

   19 Aug 00:00:12  |  The Spoof

Although Barbara Sampson, New York's chief medical examiner, has announced the cause of Epstein's death as "pending", inside sources now say an official determination has been reached.

Ms. Sampson stated that no single cause can as yet be determin...

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Unemployed Iowa Man Recognized And Almost Awarded Trophy For Epitomizing Potential Of Self-Entitlement Generation

   19 Aug 00:00:12  |  The Spoof

Jeremy Daniels, 25, of Des Moines, was fully recognized and almost awarded a trophy last week for possessing all of the attributes and personal qualities that represent the potential of the current Self-Entitlement Generation in the United States.

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Aliens On Way To Earth

   18 Aug 01:00:01  |  The Spoof

Images captured by a NASA space monitoring satellite have confirmed that Earth is likely to come under attack from an alien strike force before the end of the century.

The images show aliens advancing in formation at a very slow pace, indeed. Pres...

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Nashville Woman Changes Her System for Awarding Points

   18 Aug 01:00:01  |  The Spoof

In the past, no one ever won any points with Christa Thompson, a writer living in Nashville, Tennessee, by offering her negative feedback of any sort. But recently, after adopting a "growth mindset" which seeks to learn and grow, and enjoys the chall...

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Peter Schmeichel Says Harry Maguire Is The Best Keeper In The World Right Now

   17 Aug 01:00:01  |  The Spoof

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Brooklyn Man Realizes It's Not His Mother to Blame for All His Problems; It's His Father

   17 Aug 01:00:01  |  The Spoof

With the help of decades of therapy to turn around his addiction, self-esteem, and abandonment issues while trying to avoid being consumed with resentment at his narcissistic, manipulative mother for causing all his problems, 33-year-old Nate Wagoner...

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Is Gareth Bale On His Way To Hull City

   16 Aug 01:00:01  |  The Spoof

Gareth Bale, the Real Madrid and Wales footballer, who has fallen out of favour at the Bernabeu Stadium, may have found the ideal club with which to play out the rest of his career - Hull City.

Bale, 30, is a man who knows what he likes, and he li...

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Harry Maguire Is Sick And Tired Of All The Stupid Made-up Stories About Him

   16 Aug 01:00:01  |  The Spoof

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Harry Maguire Says He Didn't Sign Last Season Because Jose Mourinho Was Manager

   15 Aug 01:00:02  |  The Spoof

Manchester United central defender, Harry Maguire has revealed the real reason he didn't sign for the club a year ago, when Jose Mourinho was the Reds' boss: Jose Mourinho.

Maguire, 26, had been on the United radar for the last two summer breaks,...

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